After missing so many story times due to illness, all I wanted to do today was get out there and sing my little heart out with my kiddies. I’d been thinking about it for ages, missing it, planning for it, practicing for it, preparing for it.
I got to work, I made a cup of tea, I pulled out my materials, I looked at the meeting room, and I realized that I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t do it. I was still coughing like a coal miner, and there was no way my reedy voice was going to fill that crowded space.
Despite my best intentions, I had to accept that I still wasn’t fully recovered. The kids deserved the best story time program they could get, whether it was from myself or from someone else. I had to accept that, and I had to put the kids first.
So I did. Though it nearly made me cry with disappointment, I asked a colleague to cover my story time for me. It may sound dramatic, but I was gutted. To still be sick, after over a month, was just so frustrating, and I just wanted to scream (but I was in a library, so I “shhh’d” myself).
The most important thing for a children’s librarian is to provide the best possible service for the families in his or her community, and the best way I could do that was by accepting my limitations and swallowing my pride.
It hurt, I won’t lie, but it was for the best. Now I just need to focus on a complete recovery so I can get back to doing the things I love most.